Troll 2

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Goblins and witches and popcorn, oh my! Join young whiner Joshua and his goofy family on a dark journey into the heart of Nilbog, a mysterious township of cannibalistic vegetarians (??) who may or may not be hiding a more vicious supernatural secret, in this, the Crown Jewel of Bad Cinema, the one-and-only Troll 2!

“There are movies that are bad. There are movies that are so-bad-they’re-good. And then there’s Troll 2 – a movie so bad that it defies comprehension.” – Mountain Xpress

“Be afraid … be TWICE as afraid!” warned the tagline for this legendarily jaw-dropping cinematic train-wreck, the totally unrelated follow up to the 1986 horror flick Troll, starring Sonny Bono. A more fitting tagline might have been, “What the hell was that? Seriously, what was that?” Made by the infamously wonky Italian filmmaker Claudio Fragasso (Monster Dog) and a group of unknown amateur actors in rural Utah, Troll 2 is so uniquely and endearingly weird that it simply must be seen to be believed.   From hilariously clumsy rubber-faced trolls (who are actually goblins, or rather, child actors dressed up in bad goblin masks and potato sacks, but who’s really keeping track of such minor details?) to an evil witch with bad teeth who can make corn on the cob pop with her sensuous body heat, and from a ghostly bearded grandpa with a sore disposition to a whiny pre-teen who prefers to pee on his dinner rather than eat it (“You can’t piss on hospitality!”), this epically awful sled ride to insanity is like a nightmare suffered by Ed Wood, Jr. after eating too much bad pork. Never before or since has a no-budget, vegetarian-themed horror movie sequel with a Casio keyboard-fueled soundtrack inspired so much cult adoration. Truly majestic in its incompetent incomprehensibility, it really doesn’t get much worse (or rather, it doesn’t get much better) than Troll 2. Oh … My … God! (Dir. by Claudio Fragasso, 1990, USA, 95 mins., Rated PG-13)