She

Take cover, because it’s WOMEN OF ACTION Month at Mondo Mondays, featuring badass B-movies filled with femme-fueled fury that will really knock you out!

“Sandahl Bergman Tempted Conan, and Now She is Ready to Take on the World!” Statuesque ‘80s B-movie action queen Sandahl Bergman (Conan the Barbarian) rips it up in this supremely cheesy, femme-driven, post-apocalyptic/sword & sorcery mash-up allegedly based on the classic fantasy novel by H. Rider Haggard. Set 23 years after an apocalyptic event called “The Cancellation,” She follows a trio of questionably heroic “heroes” (Tom, a muscular lunkhead; Dick, a comic relief nerd; and Hari, Tom’s feisty sister. See what they did here? Tom, Dick and Hari. Let the hilarity begin!), who get into trouble when Hari is kidnapped by a tribe of bad ‘80s movie degenerates. Meanwhile, She (Bergman), a sexy and powerful Queen, rules over her kingdom with an iron fist and an aerobicized body, which she proudly displays without provocation. Her all-female army treats men like servants and sex toys, so all seems right with the world, but due to a series of ludicrous plot twists involving ancient prophecy and frequent nudity, She ends up helping Tom find and rescue Hari, but first they’ve got to face a gauntlet of some of the most ridiculous bad guys in the history of bad movies, including a tutu- wearing giant, a telekinetic communist dictator, toga-wearing werewolves and a colony of chainsaw-wielding lepers who wear sunglasses and wrap themselves in mummy drag. Driven by a rocking heavy metal soundtrack that makes the whole thing feel like a bad Lita Ford music video from the early ‘80s, as well as the butt-kicking charms of leading lady Bergman, She is just what the doctor ordered for anyone with an addiction to insane cinema. (Dir. by Avi Nesher, 1982, Italy, badly dubbed in English, 105 mins., Rated R)